How to enjoy a rainy Saturday!

Another semester has come and gone. This was a rough one! I took three classes, taught one class, worked full-time and played mommy. Again it was such a blur I am not sure what I actually learned ..... grades will be out soon so that will at least tell me what I managed to convince my professors I learned. 

I had all sorts of plans for today, finally plant some flowers and clean the front yard were on the top of my list. After the winter we had my little flower garden and my strawberry patch are looking pretty sad (the pictures are of my garden seeing better days! If I took a picture now it would be a barren wasteland). But mother nature had other plans for me .... cold icky rain. This is probably for the best, because my body has just realized that a lot of the pressure is off and it just wants to sit on the couch and do absolutely nothing all day! 

How does one accomplish that with an active seven year old in the house? Sometimes it is ok for your child to spend a rainy Saturday doing nothing! This is something that parents today seem to struggle with. In a culture where life is so scheduled and we are told not to let them watch too much television or play too many video games we forget that sometimes it is ok to just chill. Right now he is on the phone with his best friend while they both play Club Penguin. I am in the other room having my own private Walking Dead marathon. 

One of the things that I have learned in my classes over the past two semesters is that we as a society have put too much pressure on our children at too young an age. Too many parents want their children to do everything that they think will give them an edge in adulthood - sports, drama, music lessons, church, academics, the right friends, every second of every day scheduled to the hilt. Add to that bullying, the isolation caused by social media, and an increasing acceptance of violence in our communities and what we have done is raise a generation of very young children with anxiety disorders, eating disorders and other mental health problems.

The conclusion I have come to is that it is ok to spend a rainy Saturday doing nothing. Allow your brain to relax, spend the day curled up on the couch watching Scooby Doo. Maybe bake a cake or do some coloring ... maybe not. And most important for a completely stress free Saturday .... stay in your pajamas! 

After I ended classes on Thursday (I handed in two 10-15 page papers, gave a group presentation & did an individual presentation) I got a massage on Friday. I have talked about this before, but I think it is worth mentioning again. If you have lupus or even fibromyalgia I can't recommend massage enough! While it seems counter-intuitive to recommend massage for people who have chronic pain and inflammatory disease I am convinced that my monthly massage is what has kept me going for these past 4 months of classes and craziness. 

I get my massages at Massage Envy and they are FABULOUS!!! What I like most about them is that they asked about my health history and my health concerns on my fist appointment and matched me with a therapist who specializes in working with people who have chronic pain. She asks me before each session if I am in a flare or if I am having really bad fibro pain and she adjusts my massage accordingly. Most of the time, 99.9% of the time, a massage makes me energized and focused and ready to take on the world! But yesterday I was in such rough shape that it just made me tired and I don't know if it was the sudden release of energy, but I actually ended up with a migraine. I only mention this because people with chronic pain who start massage therapy need to understand that every once and awhile you may feel worse after a massage the next day. This does not mean it isn't working, it just means your body is in a different place on that day. 

The last thing I want to mention today before I embrace my day of NOTHING is a blog that is worth the read. Still Life is written by my cousin's wife. I have had people tell me that the way I handle lupus is inspirational - I don't see it. When I think of someone who is an inspiration, this is the kind of person I think about - and when I feel like giving in to self-pity, this is the kind of person I look to. If you have the time it is well worth the read! 

So, here is to starting a summer full of inspiration ... gardens and sunshine and beaches and travels ..... with an occasional rainy Saturday of absolutely nothing sprinkled in the mix! 

Medical Monday ..... what do you do for you?

It's Monday, which means we're starting the week off with some positive motivation:

"It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority. It’s necessary."

What are you doing to take care of yourself today?

SLE Lupus Foundation Facebook Status

Once again I have been missing. I have been busy and overwhelmed, and exhausted, and lupusy. But mostly busy.

In June my Nana passed away. I have mentioned her often in this blog. We referred to her as the Queen Mum because she loved everything English. She and I would talk for hours about religion and mostly my complete misunderstanding of it. I use her in my class discussions to highlight the battle women had to go through in the workplace and that we all have to thank strong independent women like her for lighting our path. Her sayings still play out in my mind everyday - when I want to throw in the towel I hear her tell me I have had my self-pity and it is time to move on; or when I didn't understand why my life had taken a turn I didn't expect she would tell me everything happens for a reason and I will understand it someday if I take the time to look back. More often than I want to admit she was right.  There was always a place at her kitchen table and a cup of tea ready if you needed it. She taught me about opening my door to others even if I don't think I have enough for me. She taught me about faith and hope and strength and understanding. She was my idol and my moral compass. I will miss her more than I can even think about and not a day has gone by that I have not thought of her and the hope that wherever she is, she is happy and proud.

That was the beginning of my summer. Then there was the wedding trip to Chicago - and the 7th birthday water park extravaganza in my backyard, teaching three classes, working, and keeping things afloat on the homefront. Soon I will be on vacation, but even then I seem to need a vacation from my vacation when I get home.

 
 


Shedd Aquarium



Chicago from the Shedd Aquarium



The Wedding Fountain



My Boys - Walking to the Adler Planetarium



So the quote from SLE asks what are you doing to take care of yourself today? I am going to talk about what I have done to take care of myself this summer!

I get a massage every month! This was an AWESOME Christmas present. My Aunts got me a gift certificate for a massage. I had never gotten one! Now I go every month. For one hour a month I am just relaxed. Then I hit traffic on the way home and I am tense again - but for 1 hour I am not. Everyone should do it.

 

The massage helps not only with my mental relaxation, it is great for the fibromyalgia and lupus. My doctor had been telling me for years that massage and yoga would be good for me. I wish I had listened sooner ..... I am working up to the yoga!

 

For the most part I have stopped commenting on the news that makes me angry. I still keep myself well informed and I most definitely have opinions - but I have stopped sharing those opinions with everyone who posted a comment on a news story. The news just makes me so sad these days. The death toll on my homepage everyday makes me want to hide under my covers and not leave the house.  So for my sanity I am taking more news breaks so that I can feel a little more in control of my surroundings - even if I'm not.

  





The Boston Skyline from the plane ... almost home.



 

I took a cake decorating class. Friends and family are probably sick of looking at my cakes but I love them. And I am AMAZED that I made them. I kind of took the class as a joke. I never imagined that I would actually succeed at making my own frosting and decorating a cake. It is just so outside my comfort zone. Baking and cake decorating are very precise art forms ... and I am kinda all over the place.
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have the most wonderful husband who has set up the most tranquil backyard for me. I can lounge in my lounge chair under the pine tree in the shade and hang out with my son while he tinkers in the garage. All of us doing our own thing but doing it together.

 

I have managed a day at the beach, a day at the zoo and time at the library.

 

It has been a very busy summer with lots of things that I have been able to do for myself in between all the craziness that is my world.

 

But the biggest thing I have done is decide to go back to school and get my license in mental health counseling. It isn't that I don't like my job or that I am planning to move on, but I think it is always good to have a plan B. I am really nervous - I have not read a text or written a paper in 10-years. I am pretty sure I am going to like grading papers better than I like writing papers! But I think that when you stop learning your brain dies (I don't think this is actual scientific fact - just an observation).

 

And for me, I will once again try to keep up with the blog (no promises).

 

So, the SLE Foundation asked what I do for myself and I have shared. Feel free to share what you do for yourself. It isn't just if you have an illness that makes your life complicated. Everyone needs to take time out to take care. Don't forget to do that and enjoy the rest of the summer!