"A word in earnest is as good as a speech"
~Charles Dickens: Bleak House

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Thoughtful Thursday ..... what would it be like to not worry about money?



Let's be honest .... a million dollars doesn't mean much anymore. Really, how long could you live a moderately stable life with a million dollars, after you pay off the house, purchase a car, and maybe take the trip you have always wanted to take you may have a year or two without having to find a job. Granted - once you found that job you wouldn't have a mortgage which would be nice.
 
So why the blog about cash - I am not poor, the bills get paid, my kids get fed, we have some extras and while I will probably never be able to travel the world and get to all the places on my "places I want to visit" Pinterest Board I am ok ... and then ....
 
This morning I saw a news article about a theft at Joel Osteen's church. The church raised $600,000.00 in one weekend! I am not even going to get into a conversation about Joel Osteen and his "church" but I will ask, what does the "church" need with $600,000.00 a weekend (that amount does not include the credit card numbers that were placed in the collection dish!)? Isn't there a vow of poverty? Looking at Mr. Osteen's suit, religion has paid him well. I am pretty sure God did not envision a mega-church as the place people go to for lessons on living a virtuous life. But apparently 40,000 people a weekend disagree with me.
 
But the idea for this blog occurred prior to my hearing about the plight of the Osteen "church."
 
I am having a midlife crisis. I decided last year that I would go back to graduate school. It isn't that I hate my job - but I hate my commute. I figured if I was going to change careers I would change it to something that I have always wanted to do. So I am attempting to get first my Master's in mental health counseling, and then my license so I can be an actual counselor. I should have done this while I was young! Just sayin'
 
Part of my program is that I need to complete a 15 hour a week internship for the MSMHC and then a 30 hour a week internship for the CAGS program to get my license. The majority of the people in my program are in their 20s, most not working and living with mom & dad, so adding an unpaid internship into their lives is not much of a problem. But being a 40 something mom w/a mortgage makes this process a bit more complicated. And a bit more stressful!
 
I have a rather long commute to work everyday and it gives me a lot of time to think. I have concluded that in order to accomplish my goal I either need to add an eighth day in the week - or win $250,000.00 so that I can quit my job until I finish my program. Looking at in black & white that is a huge number! I find myself dreaming about it, stressing out about it, playing the lottery on the weekend praying for it. As much as I hate to admit it that number has taken over my life (and not in a good way). It is the thing keeping me from accomplishing a simple goal .... I am not greedy, I don't want a big house, or a fancy car, and I can even live without traveling the world. All I want is to finish the degree I should have finished years ago and have a shorter commute so I can spend some more time at home. A friend of mine at work suggested that I find 100 friends who are willing to donate $2,500 to the cause - when I said that was an awesome idea and when could I expect her check she just giggled (I guess you can tell how well that is going to work).
 
So, the realization that a "church" in which the "pastor" wears thousand dollar suits got $600 thousand in donations in one weekend was a little bit disheartening.
 
So in reality this blog was all about venting ... I will find an internship that work with my schedule .... I will complete my graduate degree .... I will find a job without a crazy commute ... it just won't be easy (nothing worthwhile ever is according to both my Yia-Yia and my Nana). The insurance companies will take care of the "mega-church" and Mr. Osteen will continue preachin' and the world will continue to turn.
 
But if I had a millions dollars .......